


Silent Chambers of the Soul  Part Four

by Kellygirl



Category: Firefly
Genre: Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-05-01
Updated: 2003-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-29 08:12:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14468562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kellygirl/pseuds/Kellygirl
Summary: The crew continues to adjust while on the way to Persephone.





	Silent Chambers of the Soul  Part Four

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Firefly’s Glow](https://fanlore.org/wiki/Firefly%27s_Glow), and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2018. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Firefly's Glow collection profile](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/fireflysglow/profile).

 

Silent Chambers of the Soul Part Four

## Silent Chambers of the Soul Part Four

### by Kellygirl

Silent Chambers of the Soul  
Part Four  
Notes: Thanks to Cabiria for the fab beta. No money being made, characters not mine. Feedback is greatly appreciated. 

* * *

Mal wakes like he usually does, with an alertness that tears through any fuzziness or confusion that used to hover before the war taught him those moments between sleep and wakefulness could cost him his life. He stares into the darkness of his cabin, feeling Simon's arms, legs and head resting against various parts of his body. Mal's body tells him it isn't time to get up but it soon will be. Should he try to go back to sleep or go ahead and get up? 

Simon moves, murmuring in his sleep, and Mal rubs his soft, silky hair. He quiets and Mal continues to stroke his hair, thinking through what he needs to do today. He sent three waves to people that have had contact with Badger and he hopes they can give him insight to the so called 'underworld king' of Persephone. 

He sighs and decides to get up, get dressed and get some coffee. He considers the man sleeping beside him. He doesn't want to wake Simon, but it's going to be impossible to get out of the bed without disturbing him. He nudges his shoulder, and Simon jumps and opens his eyes. He looks around frantically before relaxing and giving Mal a sleepy smile. 

"Good morning." He rubs Mal's chest, his hand gliding delicately over his skin. Mal clears his throat. 

"Morning. I need to get up and get some stuff done. You can go back to sleep if you want." Simon leans over and kisses him, untangling himself from Mal's body. 

"Wish we could lie here all day, but I'll get up too. There are some articles I want to read and some other stuff I want to do in the infirmary." Mal nods and gets up. He heads for his shower and makes it a quick one, eager to get down to the business of gathering information on Badger and getting a lead on River. Getting some clues about her will give Simon some measure of relief, and himself as well. He dries off and dresses while he looks at Simon, who is still in the bed. 

"Change your mind about getting up?" Simon nods sleepily, and Mal leaves him to get some more sleep. 

After two hours of tracking down leads, Mal heads toward the kitchen, wondering what he'll find to quiet his stomach down some. Jayne and Kaylee, along with Inara are in the kitchen and all talk stops when they see him. He greets them and moves to the pot, trying to remember if it was Jayne's day to cook or Kaylee's. He tastes the food and is relieved to note it tastes like Kaylee's cooking. He sits down while the other three try and talk without mentioning whatever they were discussing before he came into the kitchen. 

He looks up to find all of them staring at him and raises one eyebrow, inviting someone to talk to him. Inara clears her throat. "How is Simon doing? Anything you want to discuss?" 

Mal looks at her and remembers Simon's hatred and bitterness towards Companions. He figures they ain't all bad and Inara is a good woman but he can't see discussin Simon with her now that he's actually here on the ship. Before they found Simon she and he had had a few hypothetical discussions about what type of things Simon might be going through and whether or not the crew of Serenity would be able to deal with whatever they discovered. He puts down his chopsticks. They do deserve an answer because they've been with him every step of the way in the search for Simon. 

"He's doing okay, no nightmares yet but I figure they'll make an appearance sooner than later. He's still angry and nervous but I expect he's going to be like that for awhile. To be honest, he's doing better than I hoped since he kinda worried me with our first conversation back in that tavern." Inara and Kaylee do some kind of eye thing where they seem to be talking without words. He finishes his food, knowing they aren't finished with their questions. Jayne shakes his head. 

"What we really wanna know is if you and him are having sex and Nara thinks it's a bad idea if you two are gettin horizontal." Mal makes no move to answer; instead he finishes his food and takes a sip of his drink. 

"That's really no one's business but no, we are not having sex." He doesn't feel any qualms about not telling them what he and Simon have done because it's between them. If Simon wants to speak about it, he won't care, but he figures Simon deserves some small measure of privacy. After talking with Zoe and Simon yesterday and sorting it out in his own head he doesn't feel anywhere near as guilty about their little make out session as he did at first. 

Inara's looking at him, studying each individual feature of his face and Mal guesses she's trying to tell if he's lying or not. He keeps his face blank, letting her see nothing. "I know he must have come on to you and I really think it would be a bad idea for him to engage in any type of sexual situations, at least right now." Before Mal can respond, a new voice enters the conversation. 

"Isn't that sweet? You worry so prettily about me but trust me, I don't need your learned observations, your worries, or your pity that you try so hard to keep concealed." Everyone's head turns as Simon comes into the kitchen. Mal notes he's wearing more of his own clothes but he really didn't have much choice anyway. His black pants hang a little loose but it's not noticeable. 

He's wearing one of his white shirts, but a few buttons are undone and his gold and leather collar is noticeable. He folds up his sleeves and continues to talk to Inara. "So don't you worry about me at all, Inara. I'll get along fine without your delicate inquires as to the state of my well being." 

The look he sends her has her straightening her spine, and she nods calmly. "I apologize if you think I was out of line." She wants to make the same offer she did of helping him but he looks at her, nods, then completely dismisses her. He acts like she doesn't exist and the way she studies his body language, she can readily believe that he is not just ignoring her presence. 

To him, she is invisible. She talks quietly for a few minutes with Kaylee and when Simon joins them, after getting a bowl of food, she watches him interact with the Captain and Jayne. 

He talks to Kaylee also and while she is not hurt by his dismissal of her, it does amaze her. She's never seen anyone successfully pull off that level of willful blindness. She waits for a pause in the conversation and she prepares to speak when Simon gives her a look she's not used to receiving. All of his attention, which earlier she had none of, is now focused on her, and he's letting her read his intentions in his eyes. 

Whatever she says, whether it's about him or not, will only amuse him like she's doing some wonderful trick by even talking at all. She coughs and quietly excuses herself. She sees Mal frown at her, probably wondering what's wrong with her, but she is a little shaken by Simon's look and decides to go meditate. 

Jayne sees the look and since he's bored he decides to ask Simon about it. He waits until Mal asks Kaylee a question about the engines and leans over and asks Simon. "So is there something going on between you and Inara? You looked at her kinda funny." Simon finishes chewing his food. 

"Not really, she offered to lend me a sympathetic shoulder to cry on and I said no. I wouldn't talk to her about anything I've been through and perhaps that bothers her. I don't really care." Jayne wishes he hadn't asked since now Mal and Kaylee are listening to Simon. 

Kaylee speaks up, ready to defend Inara. "Oh, Simon, she just wants to help. Please don't be mad at her. I know you two had words day before yesterday but she just wants to help you adjust." 

Simon looks at her and shakes his head. "I'm not mad at her Kaylee, I just don't want her help." Simon's mood switches from indifference to anger and Mal tenses. No telling what Simon will say or do next. 

"I realized that all Companions are whores, just not all whores are Companions, and the ones I met were very adamant about reminding me of my place on the food chain." He wipes his mouth and stands up. "Now if you all will excuse me I really should get to the infirmary. I have more catching up to do." 

He leaves with only a brief pause and a glance at Mal. Kaylee looks sad and stands like she wants to go after him and continue her defense of her friend. Mal grabs her arm. 

"Let it go Kaylee, you can't make him like Inara and he knows she's not like the Companions he ran into, but that knowledge is all buried underneath a lot of volatile emotions." He turns and asks Jayne to repeat what he told him earlier about the layout of Badger's headquarters, or as much as he can remember. Kaylee squeezes the Captain's shoulder in understanding and walks off to go work on her engines. Maybe later she'll visit Inara and make sure she's okay. 

* * *

Close to dinnertime, Mal checks on Simon in the infirmary. He's not there, and Mal checks his old room briefly before heading to his own room. He's quiet on the ladder in case Simon is sleep. The bed is empty but a small sound alerts Mal that someone is in the room. He turns on a small light and sees Simon sitting in a corner, his shoulder and face resting against the side of a wall. 

His eyes are closed but he's shaking, a barely heard whimper escaping his lips. Mal curses himself for not checking on him earlier. He approaches him slowly, his eyes darting around to see if Simon has a weapon. 

He doesn't see one and kneels down beside Simon. He touches his shoulder and isn't surprised when Simon flinches away from him. 

"Don't touch me, please, just...don't." Mal steps back and crouches down. He waits, noticing the tremors and the face wet with tears and sweat. "You have a nightmare?" Simon nods and wipes his face. 

"Yeah, I was tired and was just going to lie down for awhile, then I was back. Back with Killian and this party he had two days after he bought me. He tied me up and offered me like a piece of meat to his friends. And nobody gave a damn that I didn't want to be there, or that they were hurting me." 

Mal sits on the floor, his back against the wall. This must be the party they heard about, the one that made Kaylee cry and Jayne show Mal how good he was with a knife. He reaches out and touches Simon's head. When he doesn't flinch, Mal pulls him closer. He moves so Simon is in front of him and begins to slowly rub and massage the tension out of Simon's shoulders. "You want to talk about it?" Simon sighs and shakes his head. 

"Not right now. I mean, I've had nightmares before, but this one seemed so real. It doesn't help that I know the nightmares will come, I'm always going to be unprepared for them." 

Mal nods his head, knowing that feeling. Nightmares came when you expected them and when you didn't. Unwanted, they had the power to end a great day with horror or be the thing that starts your day off balance. 

"Maybe so but from experience I know you'll find ways to deal with them eventually." He uses his thumbs to circle and push the knots out of Simon's back and shoulders. "You hungry?" Simon shakes his head but Mal thinks Simon needs to get out of the room. 

"Why don't you come on down and try to eat something? If your stomach ain't up to it, at least drink some tea, listen to the conversation. Might take your mind off some things." 

He can tell Simon would rather stay in the dark, on the cold floor, but Mal wants him around people so he can shake the taint left by the nightmare. Simon seems to sense this because he gets up and briefly washes his face. 

They walk into the kitchen at the tail end of a joke Wash is telling to everyone. He fixes a plate, while Simon just fixes something to drink. They sit and listen to Wash tell more jokes and then Book tells them more stories about his time in the Abbey. Mal laughs at some gardening incident and smiles at Simon when he sees him smile briefly at the story. 

After dinner Simon volunteers to clean up and Jayne takes him up on it, since it's his turn. Everyone has left to do his or her own chores or get ready for bed and Jayne is about to leave when his suspicious nature kicks in. He turns back around and walks over to Simon. 

"What do you want?" At the look he gets from Simon, Jayne clarifies. "What do you want in exchange for doing my chore?" Simon continues to wash dishes until he's almost done. 

"I want to borrow a knife when I need it. I could use something from the infirmary but I'd rather have one of yours." 

Jayne thinks about if for a moment. He shrugs, "Sure, don't matter much to me." He hesitates as a thought occurs to him. "This is for Badger right? You ain't gonna go an use it on yourself or anyone else on board are you?" Simon wipes off the table and finishes cleaning. 

"Yes it's for Badger. I am not planning, at this time, to use it on myself or anyone on board. I'll need it once we get all the information out of Badger that we can." He pauses. "Or maybe I'll need it to convince Badger to talk. It will be up to him how soon I start to use it." Jayne nods his head. 

"Okay then, not a problem. I'm sure the Captain would space me if his pretty boy started carving up the crew or slicing his own wrists." At his words Simon looks up quickly and Jayne almost backs up a step. Simon looks pissed. 

"Do you really think I'm pretty?" Jayne ducks his head thinking that word was bound to get him in trouble sooner or later. 

"Yeah, I mean you are, but I don't mean nothing by it so don't invite yourself down to my bunk or look at me all funny like you did the first day you was back, all right?" Simon dries his hands, obviously lost in thought. 

"I wasn't planning on it, but let me ask you a question. Why do you think I'm pretty? I mean what about me makes you think of that word?" Jayne frowns and sits down on the table. Simon moves nearer and really seems interested in his answer. Jayne tries to explain. 

"It's your face. It's all clean, no scars, pale and rich looking, like you been kept away and only brought out for special occasions." Jayne sees right away that that was the wrong thing to say since it may have been true for Simon this past year. He tries to clarify what he means. "I'm not talking about your year-long absence either. I mean your eyes are all clear and intelligent looking and your hair is combed." Jayne almost blushes, trying to explain himself. 

"I think Kaylee's pretty too, for almost the same reasons. Zoe is pretty but she's got that dangerous vibe going on too. Like she'd ride you, then stop and leave before you got done. The Captain's about the same way and Inara looks beautiful and all untouchable, even if you got the coin to afford her. I guess I'd call Wash pretty too, at least he's funny when he's not making fun of me and Zoe must think he looks good." Simon still looks confused so Jayne tries to sum it up. 

"I think a lot of people are pretty or handsome or sexy or whatever. It's not a bad thing and usually my thoughts on who's pretty stay in my head." Simon still doesn't say anything and Jayne doesn't like the look in his eye. Simon clears his throat, looks down and traces patterns on the tabletop with his fingers. 

"So you're saying that all someone has to do to look pretty is be clean, have unblemished features, and comb their hair? And, oh yes, they should also be intelligent or at least just look like it?" Jayne scratches his beard. 

"Well that's just me. Different people got their own standards but those are mine and yeah, I know they may seem simple but sometimes, I'm a simple guy." Simon gives a little laugh but Jayne knows it's not at him, but in agreement about Jayne's nature. 

"Well, I just wondered. Thanks for answering my questions." He stands up and gives Jayne a thoughtful smile. "I'm going to go on to bed. Thanks for agreeing to let me use one of your knives. I know you take excellent care of your weapons, so it will be sharp and ready when I need it." Jayne stands also and waves the thanks away. 

"Sure, good night." He walks to his room, trying to remember when he's had a conversation that strange. Not just the words but the feelings he was getting from Simon. He undresses and figures Mal will deal with it. 

Mal's doing some paperwork when Simon climbs down the ladder. He hears the water turn on and splash in the sink. He can see Simon out of the corner of his eye but doesn't look up until Simon takes his shirt off and just stands there looking at himself in the mirror. He turns his head from side to side and then leans in closer to the mirror. 

Mal watches him and after a few minutes asks him, "You okay?" 

Simon turns and looks at him and nods his head. He appears to be thinking about something pretty heavily. Mal finishes his paperwork and undresses for bed. Simon joins him, placing a hand on his chest. 

"You finish getting reacquainted with the infirmary?" 

Simon yawns and replies, "Yes I did. I also got to read some interesting articles and plan to look for some more tomorrow." 

Mal nods, his body shutting down for sleep. "I got some transcripts you can go over from some contacts who periodically check for me to see if the Alliance has River. Don't know if the vids of their reports will help but a fresh set of eyes won't hurt." Simon mumbles an answer and they both fall asleep. 

* * *

Mal's eyes snap open when an unusual feeling courses through him. He knows what it is, but it's not something he's felt in awhile. Warm, slow, moist circles are being traced around his shaft, and Mal shifts when a hand drifts softly between his legs. His low moan seems loud in the room as Simon's head bobs up and down. He figures the only reason he didn't wake up when Simon first started is because he was tired and used to having Simon in his bed. 

The strength Mal had to stop Simon last time is completely absent, and he can't seem to bring up any worry about it. The next few minutes pull more sounds from him and his hips lift fractionally off the bed. Now Simon's tongue is fluttering and licking on his head, and Mal curses softly as prickles of pleasure course from his spine to up between his legs and through his cock. 

Simon just keeps licking and swallowing everything that Mal spills into his mouth. Mal finds his hand in Simon's hair without remembering putting it there. He tugs, bringing Simon's head up and his mouth away from him. 

Mal continues to softly tug until Simon crawls up his body and lies on him. Simon is hesitant to kiss him but when Mal nibbles on his lips, he opens them, and Mal tastes himself in Simon's mouth. He's glad when Simon returns the kiss, and he lets his hands roam over Simon's back. He rolls until Simon is lying beside him and he continues the kiss, letting his hand glide over the younger man's body. 

He pushes down Simon's pants and reaches for his erection. He pumps it slowly, while he continues to kiss and lick on Simon's neck, avoiding the gold and leather collar. Mal keeps licking as he scoots his body down so he can taste the skin below Simon's navel. Before he can put his mouth where his hand is, Simon stops him. He looks up and Simon's eyes are filled with lust and worry. 

"I just want your hands on me for r-right now." Mal pauses and nods his head, glad that Simon tells him what he wants, and even though he heard a faint sign at the end of his statement, it didn't come out like Simon was asking him for permission. He makes his way back up Simon's body and continues to let his hand bring Simon to a nearly silent orgasm. 

Mal holds Simon for a few minutes, then gets up and gets a wash cloth to clean him and Simon up. The clock says he has an hour left before he needs to get up. He lies back down and immediately Simon places his head on his chest, his hand on his stomach and goes back to sleep. Mal drowses, inhaling the smells of him and Simon and sex. 

Later that morning, Wash tells Mal they'll be on Persephone the next day. Since they had an ample supply of fuel, he took the privilege of getting them there faster. Mal agrees and calls a meeting after lunch. 

"Now, we all know Badger never goes anywhere alone and his place will be crawling with his people. When we land I'm sure he'll know about it within ten seconds with all the lookouts he employs. He won't know why we're there but I don't plan to underestimate him again." Mal looks around at his crew, sees they're all paying attention and continues. 

"Me, Simon, Jayne and Zoe will take the shuttle and land near the outskirts of the city thirty minutes before Serenity lands at the docks. Since we won't be sure of Badger's exact plans for the day we'll have to tread careful." 

Mal tells them they need a distraction to get Badger alone or mostly alone, with no way to call his people back once he figures out what Mal and the others are there for. One of his contacts has sent Mal the location of a little known warehouse Badger uses for really important items and plans are made to set off an explosion, thereby attracting a lot of Badger's people. If Badger shows up they'll grab him and get him to the shuttle. 

The meeting breaks up and everyone goes on to either eat or tend to ship business. Mal is eating and thinking about his plan. He hopes there are no people in Badger's warehouse, ready to be shipped out to any border moons. Getting them out will take time, and they might be more heavily guarded. He finishes and heads for the infirmary. Simon didn't eat much for breakfast, and Mal wonders if he's eaten anything at all. His footsteps are silent as he comes to the doors of the Infirmary. 

Simon has a scalpel in his hand, blood dripping from it onto the floor. He's looking at himself in the mirror. Mal can almost feel time slow down and stop. There's blood covering the right side of Simon's face from a deep cut near the outer edge of his eye. When Mal talks he can't believe how calm his voice sounds because inside he's furious wondering if Simon is about to cut his own throat. 

"What in ruttin hell are you doing?" Simon drops the scalpel and turns around. Before he can say a word, Mal is next to him, both hands locked around Simon's wrists. 

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Simon struggles but only for a moment. Mal drags him over to the examination bed and shoves him on it. He hurries to the comm and calls Book to come to the infirmary. While he's waiting he gathers cloths and other things. He looks at Simon from time to time and at the last look Simon meets his eyes. 

"I'm tired, and I'm scared." Mal doesn't say anything, just starts to clean Simon's face. He hears footsteps and, out of the corner of his eye, he sees Book entering the infirmary, Kaylee and Zoe behind him. They stop at the door while Book makes his way over. 

Mal grabs Simon's chin and tilts his face up. 

"Were you going to kill yourself? Cause I remember a certain promise you made and I trusted you to keep that promise." Simon tries to jerk away from him but Mal only tightens his grip as Book stands there watching. 

"No I wasn't going to kill myself." He looks at the wall past Mal's shoulders. "I just wanted...just wanted to lower my chances of being sold as a whore ever again. I won't be so pretty now, will I?" He jerks his face away from Mal and glares at him. He turns at glares at Zoe and Kaylee and Jayne, who has joined them at the door. "If you all will excuse us, Book needs to sew me up." They look at Mal, who wearily nods for them to go. 

Book looks at the Captain and then back at Simon. He finishes cleaning the cut on Simon's face. It starts near the corner of his eye and travels three inches down his jaw toward his mouth. It's deep, and Book wonders if Simon would have kept going if the Captain hadn't walked in. Simon makes no noise as Book starts to sew the wound shut. 

He can see the Captain looking at Simon, a hard gaze in his eye that doesn't bode well for the damaged man. He finishes and places gauze over it. He prays that Simon won't do anything like this again. 

Mal watches Book work and when he's done, helps him clean up. He picks up the scalpel that Simon used and takes it over to him. 

"I ought to cuff you to this bed Simon, let you lie here in the dark, face hurting but I figure it won't do any good. Mind explanin what exactly this is about?" He waits and can tell Simon doesn't want to talk about it but tough, he's going to. He steps away and leans against a cabinet door. 

"All my life people have noticed how I look. I never paid them any mind because any compliments my parents or I received always included how smart I was too. It was just part of who I was. But I don't want to be seen as handsome, or pretty or anything like that anymore. Maybe if I hadn't looked like I do, Badger wouldn't have sold me, at least not as a whore." Mal nods his head and waits for Book to finish the last of the cleaning. 

"Thanks Shepard, why don't you go on back to doing what you were doing." 

"Sure Captain." He places a hand gently on Simon's shoulder. "You get some rest, boy, and I'll check your stitches tomorrow if you don't feel up to it." Simon thanks him and Book leaves to let everyone know the Captain is taking care of Simon. 

"Simon, I don't know if your looks had anything at all to do with what Badger done to you. He has hates upper class people very much because he knows he can never be part of that world and he really wants that. So he would have set out to humiliate you, no matter how you looked. As for being remarked upon about your looks, it's more than those that make you who you are." 

Mal steps closer to Simon and lays a hand on his shoulder. "As for being sold again that ain't going to happen. Never again." Simon stares at him for a minute, the silence surrounding them. His voice is broken and soft. "You can't make that promise Mal. You can't and I chose to take some sort of action. Are you telling me I can't do that?" 

"Yeah, I am, if it includes hurtin yourself or someone on this boat. You want to release some of the anger and fear you got and I understand that. But you need to find another way to do it. This ain't acceptable and if you do something like this again I will restrain you how I see fit." He leans into Simon's face. 

"We understand each other?" Simon doesn't move away, just studies him with a thoughtful expression on his face. 

"Yes, Captain we understand each other." Mal stares at him for a few more tense moments, then nods his head. 

"Good, now I want to offer you a choice on your sleeping arrangements but I think you need to continue sleeping in my room. You eat anything today?" At Simon's negative response Mal walks him to the kitchen and watches as he sips on some soup. 

Mal stares at Simon's bent head and debates on whether or not he should trust him to stay in his room and not go back to the infirmary. He doesn't care that Simon was only marking himself up, he cares that Simon could have easily decided to just end it all. One quick slash and that would have been the end of him. 

Should he give Simon something to make him sleep? Lock him up in the room, when he isn't around? None of these will help Simon make the transition back to a free man but if it's for Simon's safety he is prepared to do them and more. 

They undress and lie down. He's almost asleep when he feels Simon's hand hesitantly touch his chest. He places his hand over his and whispers, "You'll get through this Simon, I know you will. You been through so much since you gave up everything and got River away from the people that were hurting her. It's going to be tough, no doubting that, but you won't let this break you." Mal isn't sure if he's trying to convince Simon or himself. He falls into an uneasy sleep, waking twice during the night. The second time he curls his body around Simon and places his arm around his waist. 

The next morning the crew eats, and no one does a lot of talking. After they're done, Mal stands up. "Everyone get ready. Simon, you need to check your cut. I'll go with you." Simon gets up and they walk to the infirmary. Mal waits and watches while Simon changes the gauze on his face. The cut is red and swollen, the black stitches standing out against Simon's pale skin. 

They meet Jayne and Zoe in the shuttle and take off. The ride is short, and soon they're making their way to Badger's warehouse. Only three men are guarding it, and Jayne knocks two of them out while Zoe takes care of the last one. They check the building, and Mal decides to take a few items that will sell quickly. 

The explosives are set and when they go off, it doesn't take long for some men to arrive. Mal counts five and with the other three tied up out behind the smoke filled warehouse that makes eight people Badger is missing. According to his information he might have about five more people around him. 

Tension in the shuttle is high as they land near Badger's small office. Zoe handles two men, shooting one in the arm and they don't meet anyone else as they make their way through dark, shadowy halls. Mal kicks in Badger's door and there is the man himself, nervous, sitting behind his desk. He frowns when Mal and Zoe enter, rising up from his desk. 

"Hello Badger, thought we'd come by and pay our respects, see how you were doing." He and Zoe disarm the three men in the office and one behind a curtain in another room. 

"Aye, what's the meanin of this then, Reynolds? You got no cause to be bustin in here." His eyes narrow and Mal keeps an eye on his hands, making sure they don't reach for anything on the desk. "You the one blow up my goods? Hwoon dahn, why'd you do that? Last job you did for me turned out all right didn't it?" 

Mal comes around the desk and places his hand on Badger's shoulder. "Oh yeah, Badger, last job was fine. I got someone I want you to meet. They're eager to see you." Mal sees sweat break out on Badger's face and knows he's figured out what's going on. 

Mal calls out, "You two, come on in." When Simon and Jayne walk in, Badger straightens up even more and glances about trying to plan a way out, a way to turn this all around. 

Ever since he'd outsmarted this man he's been so happy. One of the only Captains that didn't respect him to his face, and he'd taken two of his people from him. He could barely maintain his act the first time Reynolds had come to see him. He'd relished the chance to make him ask for his help, he's had dreams about the look that had been on his face; tired and mad and guilty. All of it had made Badger crow and laugh inside. 

He knew he'd taken a big risk, not even telling his people that the Tams were part of Reynold's crew. Betrayers were everywhere and he knew that. He never figured he'd ever see Doctor Simon Tam again. But there he stood; eyes bright and furious like an avenging Angel. 

Badger backs up a step and looks at Captain Reynolds. All he gets is a nasty smile and the gun that's been out since his door was kicked in is still pointed at him. He decides to try and bluff his way out of this fiasco. Simon speaks before he can come up with anything. 

"Hello, Badger. I told you I'd come back for you didn't I?" Yeh-soo, the smile Badger receives makes him back up another step. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Reynolds take a few steps away from him so he won't be able to make a grab for his gun. He knows he's done for and all his anger and hatred for everything Tam stands for almost blinds him. He's standing there, looking almost as fancy as he had a year ago. 

Badger was so certain he'd be dead by now or some broken toy, dumped in a whorehouse out on the rim. But no, he's here, back with his Captain and associates looking calm and polite. Except for the look in his eyes. It's not sane but Badger's cornered and he doesn't care. 

"Well, look at you doc, nice collar. You must have been quite popular to earn that. Spent a lot of time on your back have you? Bet all your fancy ways helped you out so much." A loud laugh greets his words, and he frowns. The pale doctor steps closer and Badger notices the bandage on his face. He looks back into the eyes that are boring into his, and doesn't realize he's giving off little shudders, but the other four in the room notice. Simon takes another step closer. 

"Oh yes, I had quite an educational time. Learned all kinds of things and if I didn't have more pressing matters to attend to, I'd show you each and every one." Badger's eyebrows lift when he holds out one hand. The bearded mercenary behind him pulls out a knife and places it in Tam's hand. It's not the usual knife a mercenary might use. This one is slim, sharp and gleams like silver in the dim lights of his office. 

"Gave it a extra sharpening last night." Jayne smirks at Badger. "Figured it couldn't hurt none." 

Badger watches as the doctor takes the knife. "Thank you, I'm sure it will be fine." He notices the doctor hasn't taken his eyes off of him since he stepped in the room. He glides closer. 

"Where's my sister? I want to know everything you did to her starting after I was sold." Badger feels the wall against his back but doesn't remember moving. Tam is standing in front of him, so close he can see every minute detail of his death in his eyes. 

"Did you touch her? Any of your men?" Badger's voice is caught in his throat and a minute goes by with only the sound of the soft grinding of his ceiling fan. Quicker than he can follow, a hand raises and comes down and the knife is embedded in his shoulder. He screams and feels the knife twist and pull out. His body is pulled away from the wall and he's up against his desk with the doctor leaning into him from behind. 

Hands lock around his wrists while the knife that just caused him more pain than he's ever felt is embedded in his desk. A warm voice speaks into his ear. "Start talking, or I start testing whether this knife can cut off your fingers like cutting through warm bread." 

Mal listens while Badger talks. He tells Simon he never touched his sister, that no one has touched her. Mal looks at Jayne and Zoe. Jayne's observing Simon like he's going to give him a medal later and Zoe just looks on, a slight frown on her face. Simon asks Badger where his sister is and he hesitates too long. 

His scream seems to echo on after his throat gives out. Simon doesn't flinch as he pushes Badger into his chair. There's blood on his desk, more than Mal would have thought for a dismembered finger. 

Badger's chair is turned around and he sees the doctor crouch down in front of him. Through the tears and sweat Badger didn't even realize was on his face, he looks into seemingly sympathetic eyes. 

"I am going to kill you, Badger. It's up to you on the method. I'm sure I can convince the Captain to take you somewhere your people can't find you and we can go for the long slow method or you can start talking and I'll make it quick." 

Badger shakes his head, not in refusal but in dread. It is only now that he discovers he should have never crossed this man. Forget Reynolds, he'd done nothing but watch. He believes every word Tam says but he keeps a small hope that his employees will show up. He looks up at the tall man by the door and the woman. Even if his people do come back, they have to get through everyone in this room first and by that time he'll be dead or carted off somewhere and tortured by a man who studies the human body for a living. 

Zoe watches Simon while she remains alert to anybody approaching the room. She and Wash have discussed Simon, and Wash feels uncomfortable around him, not knowing what to say or how to say anything. She told him to try and act like he always does, but knowing her husband, it will take him awhile to reconnect with Simon. 

She never had much dealing with the doctor beyond getting an injury seen to, but she knows all he needs is time and a strong hand to steady him out and he'll be fine. Doc has a backbone made of steel, and he's in better shape than she'd expected. All the stuff she'd told Mal was true because she'd noticed Simon, blushing and bright eyed around Mal before his kidnapping. So he's taking his chance now with the Captain, and she thinks the two of them will be good for each other. 

"Where's my sister?" Simon whispers. Badger looks at him, the pain from his finger almost overwhelming him. He flinches when the doctor touches his head, brushing sweat off his forehead. His eyebrow arches. "Would you like me to cut off two fingers this time?" Badger shakes his head. 

"No, I'll tell you." He pauses to lick his lips. "She's here, in a room down the hall. I-I kept her so I could try and get'er to tell me stuff about my enemies but she don't do it so well. I got a doc that keeps her drugged up most times and everyone knows not to mess with her." 

Mal looks at Badger, not believing it can be this easy. River's been here the whole time? He waits for Simon's reaction. 

Badger follows Tam's movements as he stands up. He shudders as eyes study every inch of his face, then his body. He moves off to the side and makes a get-up gesture with his hands. 

"Let's go see. I think you're telling the truth but it never hurts to make sure. If you are I'll make it quick. If not, we leave so we can stop worrying about your employees coming back and I start decorating your body with enough cuts to make you scream for a very long time." Badger nods and holds his injured hand close to his chest. 

He leads Tam and the Captain down a little traveled hallway to a small gray door. He punches in a code on a keypad and when it beeps, he punches in another code. Reynolds opens the door and shoves him in first. He checks the room for any traps then moves aside so Simon can enter. Both of them look at a small figure lying on a small bed. Simon crosses to the bed and stares at the sleeping girl. Mal walks over, and it's her. 

End part four 

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